Drop 149: Pimp

pimpAfter three months, I was excited to see the gang again. I’d lost 12 pounds and was toned from all the running and working out, had a new hairstyle that really looked good, had finally fixed my teeth, and was tanned for just about the first time ever.

I arrived and they all greeted me cheerfully, but mentioned nothing about my looks.

I sat down and ordered a coffee. Still nothing.

Finally Tom stared me right in the face and said: ‘Jesus, buddy, look at you!’

I smiled.

‘You’ve been busy since we saw you, haven’t you?’

My smile grew.

‘Busy growing a zit! Spent the whole summer on the task by the looks of it.’

‘What?’

‘Yes, very impressive,’ Paul added. ‘A beast.’

I stopped smiling. Christ, of all the things they’d noticed, it had been the pimple between my eyes. Whatever, I only cared what Sally, who wasn’t there yet, thought anyway.

Just then she arrived, hugging me warmly, stirring my insides with her scented softness. God I’d missed her.

‘Wow!’ she said, grabbing me firmly by the shoulders to look me over. ‘Check this guy out!’

I got excited again.

‘Someone splice some rhino genes into your DNA over the summer or what!’ She laughed. ‘That thing is huge! You’re more unicorn than man at this point. Shall we order you a nice bowl of rainbow-colored grass?’

By EM Vireo

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About EM Vireo
flooding the world with fiction

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